I'm half single.
Please tell me it's the bottom half.
there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
I STRONGLY considered not bringing that guy home with me last night simply because I'd JUST changed my sheets that morning.
I just don't know about this life anymore. Quite frankly I think I belong up there in the great blue, lounging on a cloud sippin tea with Jesus
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
The way I kissed her was actually pretty charming and then it devolved to car sex
You still owe me a blowjob for knowing more about hurricanes than you.
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
Where the fuck are you? I just got punched in the nose by a tourist
All she said to me before going to get another shot was "Damn, I'd eat her out."
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
Randomize
