Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
i just got a UPS package from a name and address i dont know, with one of my thongs in it. no recollection.
Dude, she literally stopped, mid fuck said "I want soup" got off my dick and make top ramen.
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
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Remember when I peed in the trash can in the ATM room last night?
Never thought I'd say this, but thank god for my blackouts.
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
I feel so nauseous and all I want is string cheese. My life never makes sense.
So we just smoked a bowl, out of an antler, with this old dude, while standing at the bar. Dude just walked up and said we were in his spot, just began packing it and handing it around...
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I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
Just to clarify, I'm still tripping balls
On an unrelated note, I've come up with a theory of everything
your life is going to be an empowering working mom montage tomorrow to Katy P's ROAR... --are you living in a yoplaít comercial?
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
No more bourbon. Sleep now. I may die. Pray for me.
The neighbor just poured gasoline on his 2 brush fires and proceeded to shoot Roman candles at them 🤔
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