she started talking about my kids
was she topless?
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
I got a lap dance until she said they wipe of the poles between each dance to clear the "std slime", i couldnt even masterbate at home it was a horrible military monday
Dude, you were so drunk last night that when we went into subway, you forgot the word for bread.
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
You texted me a picture of your face along with #help
She called to say her plane was running late and i had 30minutes to get to the airport for bathroom sex
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
I REALLY NEED TO STOP CELEBRATING THAT FUCKING HOLIDAY
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
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