it tastes like there's a party in my mouth and everyone is throwing up
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
just hooked up with an air force officer in a hotel room paid for by the military. i feel like i should go around thanking taxpayers for the assist.
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
She just admitted to me that she was a pinecone.
he just texted me saying he needs a place to stay for the night. pretty sure i just got booty called to my own house...
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's one am and you're asking me if you should buy a plane ticket for a booty call.
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
last night is slowly putting itself back together. Its one giant slutty puzzle, all the pieces are covered in tequila and shame.
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
I'm in the fetal position trying to figure out a way to get someone to deliver me pancakes.
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