i think i have reached a jessica simpson level of regret
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
I just baptized the girl next to me. LONG LIVE THE CHURCH OF VODKA
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
Like, I want sex but I also would be okay with Netflix
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
Randomize
