Just fell off a train. Bad.
you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
the only reason he called me tonight was because I fertilized his crops on farmville.
I really hope I'm not the first person who's had to wash vomit off of cash and credit cards.
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
So i'm in a museum and theres a punch bowl from 1765 with a picture of 3 men forcing the 4th to drink the punch bowl. Colonial hazing
When he came downstairs he looked at me like I was attempting to rob his house.
Did you reintroduce yourself?
He threatened to call the cops.
He said I act like a cross between a kindergartener and a high 70 year old man. Which is inacurate because it fails to account for the disco obsession.
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
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