omg! a creepy truck driver just made a frog puppet wave at me!!!
The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
you should have walked with me to my car. you just missed a girl rip off her bra and throw it into a dumpster and scream mardi gras
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
I feel like the way you told me you weren't pregnant was pretty anticlimactic.
I came back and almost ran over two people passed out in my driveway I've never met before in my life
I made out with drunk Joe Dirt and then put his mullet wig on for him. True Halloween romance.
I had a dream that my roommate walked in on me masturbating and I hissed "I'm not stopping this orgasm train for the likes of you" and just kept going
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
Just threw up in a baggy on the airplane. The guys next to me clapped and bought me a jack and coke.
Livin the dream
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