i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
You know, Peter Parker would not have been nearly as cool if he had gotten bitten by an ant.
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
I got to find out the airplane alcohol limit, and somehow I made it through the flight.
Also I legit had a girl at my bar crying tonight saying to her friend "why did he have to take his top off ?"
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
What type of condoms do you get ? Oh and do you want a slurpee while I'm here
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
Randomize
