two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
I think Memorial Day also marks the beginning of "Bikini Profile Picture" season.
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
I told him I was engaged, had 911 on speed dial and made him wear his seatbelt, then dropped his drunk ass off at his motel...probably not the night he was expecting.
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
She needs sedatives and a leash
You wanna know how bad I feel? I couldn't get out of bed to get the remote, so I just downloaded the comcast app on my phone so I could change the channels
He'd rather cuddle with his shitty little miniature dog than the half naked girl in his bed. I've lost all hope for him and my vagina
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
Randomize
