TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
We ended up on a hotel balcony in Daytona where she lured a seagull down with a pizza crust she found in her purse and preceded to grab it out of the air by it's neck.
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
he just texted me saying he needs a place to stay for the night. pretty sure i just got booty called to my own house...
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
I spent three hours in the ER last night to figure out that my friend just had to take a shit
Randomize
