sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
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Too tired to do the dishes so I made mac and cheese in a teapot. There's still some left if you want some...
I'm not gonna lie. having my legs shaved for me in the morning was a lovely surprise.
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
Not enough. Tell the person next to you to give you their drink. I give you permission. And then chug it. Be a hero tonight.
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Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
I dont have to work tomorrow im yelling gibberish at squirrels
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
You almost got us killed.
YOU’RE WELCOME FOR NAVIGATING YOU TO A ONCE IN A LIFETIME EXPERIENCE.
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
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