...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
if you don't open the door right now liz is going to get pregnant
Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
Just fucked a hooker at a motel in New Jersey. Two states down, 48 to go.
Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
You're the only person I know who can be puking into a trash can at 8 in the morning in Manhattan and get a date out of it....
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
I need you to teach me how to be roommates with somebody I'm not fucking.
theres a girl in the library eating whip cream out of a starbucks cup... only whip cream, im way to high for this shit
she wouldnt leave because they were playing One Direction. I'm dating a thirteen year old.
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