just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
I'm smoking weed out of a trumpet
I just did a slip and slide down the hall way of my apartment building
Tie
I will make out with the first guy who tries to pick me up with a lyric from a rap song. I won't even reply, just be on him like whoa.
Don't worry. I just took 2 benadryls and beat off. I'm practically sleep texting
Bagel with cream cheese. It's blowing my fucking mind.
How high are you right now..
I MICROWAVED IT. SIGNIFICANT IMPROVEMENT.
If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
Even my vagina gasped.
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
He held the beaver pelt from the fireplace over my crotch and asked his friend "she look familiar now?", he then remembered my name.
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
Trust me. My dick only does selfies for you.
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
Randomize
