he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
why is my clorox wipe dispenser full of tortillas?
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
I can't help you right now because I'm shaving my feet...like a lady.
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
I just realized I'm having shark week, during shark week.
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
will you help me invent vagina-safe pop rocks?
Randomize
