And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
Where is my rescue team. I keep hiding shit. And I'm trying to give out shots of olive oil
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
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I opened my package from my mom today. She put four bottles of tequila in the bottom under my ducky slippers. She knows me way to well.
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
My goal in life is to ruin sex for someone. To be so mindblowingly unreal that they can never find anyone like me ever again. So far it's going well.
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I feel a little uneasy about having my grandma sleep in my bed that I've banged chicks in not too long ago... Fuckin blizzards
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
I was just thinking about all the dick I could catch while I am home. But then I realized I am too lazy to get out of my pjs and leave my cat.
I'm not talking about Donald Trump in the midst of sending you nudes
I'm not sure. I have to find the Greeks I was with last night and see if they can explain to me why I can't hear out of my right ear and why I look like I got the shit kicked out of me
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
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