When I went to court, my judge's name was Honorable Ball. I couldn't stop laughing.
that probably didn't help your case.
i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
She keeps sending, "show me your elephant trunk."
Im sleeping in your bed. Sorry for the sand and the noise and the loud people. Im starving
Your blankets are not drunk friendly
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
Would it be sad if I made a blanket fort to get drunk in till the power came back?
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
You know you're an upperclassmen when you go to a party with no makeup, wet hair, weed socks, and no shoes, take a shot ski, then leave
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
I think the pizza guy was in shock..
Well I didn't mean to answer the door only in socks but I mean come on, 4 hours of sex works up an appetite! I WAS RAVENOUS
Don't forget my pants whenever you come over, otherwise we can't get in.
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
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