The trick is to not slur when purchasing the condoms at 3am
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
We were both halfway out the window trying to give each other high fives over the roof while the dude was going 150.
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
You won’t make it to November. A 21st bday and Halloween in the same night has shitshow/ jail written all over it. So I call dibs on that tall guy
I let a naked juice spill down my leg for like 30 minutes bc i thought i was hallucinating that my leg was cold.
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
She told me to act like the hulk during sex. Shit got 9 different shades of weird
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
Do you ever look at someone's Snapchat story and think ‘you told me you would eat my ass’?
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
That butt dial turned into a booty call.
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
Randomize
