He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
Ryan Howard.... the only guy who struck out more than me this weekend
and then he said "my sister has the same underwear!" please come get me.
My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
you know it's a good party when the fucking floor caves in. THE FUCKING FLOOR.
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
You had sex with a kid to spare him the shame of being a virgin. Evidence is on my side.
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
I just read my D.A.R.E. essay from 5th grade. I'm having mixed feelings about my previous life choices right now.
Randomize
