Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
I woke up in a house cuddled up with a beagle on a futon. have no idea who anyone is but they all call me stretch. yeaaahhh boiiiiii
we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
drunk pissing on my closed toilet lid is actually quite a sobering experience
Sharon took in a random bleeding stranger drunker than her, named her Nicole, and is feeding her jello shots on the toilet
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We are sitting here staring into each others eyes, mutually rubbing forks up and down our respective noses. High as balls doesn't even begin to cover it.
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
In hindsight, drunkenly yelling "I'M TICKLISH" might not have been an entirely wise decision
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
Randomize