pissed the bed twice, first one side then rolled over , other side. boom.
were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
Hey I never found my wallet but i did find a bag of 14 soft taco supremes
I have your wallet. Trade you for the tacos.
When you gave the girl your number the fat girl was like "take mine....here please take mine"
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
Somewhere between the 30 minutes of cunnilingus, the improvised song about the Olympics, and the super thoughtful shower beer... I knew I married the right guy
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
You know that you're in a bad spot when the doctor puts you on 500mg of amoxicillin 4 times a day for ten days and puts refills on it...
My guy issues hinge on tonight's game. Caps win, it's Dustin. Rangers win, Josh. I even flipped a coin to see who got what team
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
He's a drill sergeant! The sadomasochist in me can't resist that.
Randomize
