break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
I hate ducks.
What?
they're sketch. like squirrels. squirrels are sketch as fuck.
i can't believe you bought a jetta. you know that's a girl car, right? if i hadn't had sex with you, i'd have no other proof you're straight.
he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
She forgot my birthday again. How do you forget something that came out of your vagina???
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
I just slow jerked to the titanic theme song, i dont think theres enough alcohol in the state to get me over her tonight
Dude too much vodka. I think I just puked up my heart
That's what you get for taking that guy home. The god of sluttiness is frowning upon you.
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
Fuck you, I'm yelling at a mountain right now
I need you to be best friend brutally honest about whether or not I can go into public like this.
Just remember that no one else gets to suck his dick but you, feel honored. It's like the Olympic torch of life is being passed off to you and it's your time to run
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
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