She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
you were so drunk when the pizza guy got there you told him that you didn't have any money and would trade him the pizza for 3 Porno movies and he totally did it. I may never have to pay for pizza again
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
Revised rule: don't put your dick in the general vacinity of mental instability.
Not even dry humping. Not even a little bit.
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
I have enough bourbon in me to put Justin's cat in the dishwasher.
I think weed is turning my hair brown
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
Listen. You dont know how advanced you are in yoga till you have to shave your butthole
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
Not this time. I'm drinking in my sweatpants which means I've given up for the day and shouldn't be in public.
Fine I’ll come with you but you better tell that guy to wear some longer shorts because the second I see a rogue nut I’m gone
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