You made me cry and you don't even care
I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
does it bother you that i swallowed like millions of your unborn children
actually, i try not to think about it
and i pooped them out
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so, I mean this in the straightest way possible, but don't you ever just feel like you owe Jon Stewart a blowjob...
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
my roommates tied me up with rope and duct tape then left me outside the door to the hot girls' suite on my floor, knocked on the door and ran away leaving me there with a sign that says free
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just plagiarized Dr. Curtis Connor's ideology from Spider-man in an essay on genetically engineered embryos. College: academic integrity at its finest.
Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar.
She said she wanted you to slurp her vagina like a spaghetti noodle.
dude, last night I won a real sword and a bottle of vodka in a cards against humanity tournament
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
I saw a drunk guy run across the street with an American flag between his buttcheeks.
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