There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
They're like penises that have been put in a blender.
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
Which genius got me a voicemail of myself puking?
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
He's the kind of drunk guy that would pee in your mouth while you give him head.
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
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not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
We don't watch enough power rangers
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
I’M DRUNK AND EXCITED.
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