Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
tell me how a rose bowl party involves waking up to find a raccoon in my kitchen cabinet eating my oreos the next morning?
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
How do I tell her I need the lights out when I'm getting head because she and my mom share a perm color
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
Sorry for trying to baptize you last night
You knew the entire thing in Latin I was so impressed
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
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