just because you dressed up as a brontosaurus doesn't mean you can poop in my yard and roar at my neighbors
OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you.
I'm officially my mother.. Smoking in the garage pretending to take the dog out in a big ugly jacket
i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
i just remebered that we smoked out my hamster yesterday...
i hope hes still alive. i just remember you give him a shit load of cereal and saying "trust me your going to need it"
He tried to make an olympic torch by lighting a corona box on top of a pool cleaner.
You were fucked up like a footballbat trying to eat gum off your shoe. And that wasn't even the nights lowest point.
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
I got a lap dance last night from a girl while I was wearing a Captian America onsie. My life does not suck.
I saw some guy masturbating in the Burger King parking lot and I’m just fucking done
Randomize