Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
i gave him the "yep, i was your girfriend's collegiate lesbian sex story" head nod
It was some time between the gurgles of her blowing me to us throwing up in the same bucket afterwards that I realized we would be doing this a lot.
These headphones make me feel like I'm sitting on John Mayers lap and he's singing just to me. I picture like a pitch black room with a single spotlight on us. Also, convinced Kyle to give me percocet soo.
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
New level of stoned. My Terry's Chocolate Orange didn't 'whack-and-unwrap' so I ate it like an apple.
The cute guy in my class hurt himself and is on crutches. My first thought was "Good. He'll be easier to take down." Like he's a gazelle and I'm a dick tiger. What's wrong with me?
It might've been him telling me last night that he "doesn't even need beer goggles to fuck me." When I thought that was sweet, I realized something needed to change.
STOP WHATEVER YOU ARE DOING AND GO OUTSIDE RIGHT NOW. THE MOON LOOKS LIKE CATWOMAN
No one likes wet exercise unless it's vigorous sex in the shower
Nothing can teach you regret more efficiently than a wine hangover.
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
...its technically supposed to be for the bridal shower but I think I can find an ensemble that says "im hopped up on x. Stick your tongue down my throat." As well as " im supporting your marriage to my brother"
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
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