vagina is talking i cant
buying booze in bulk is always a bad idea. i wish there was some direct deposit-like system
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
You know what's soul crushing? Walking to subway and find out you were too drunk to put on shoes and being denied service.
Um. I literally have no words.
I showed that dick picture that your date texted you to everyone because you passed out and left your phone unattended. Your fault. Plus his cock was big so his fault too.
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
She made this little rubber cap thing that looks like a brain to go on my dick. She calls it a "penis cap". Industrial design students are weird...
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
My manager is trying to help me find a good career path, and I'm trying to find a professional way to tell him I just wanna smoke and fuck.
Randomize