somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
Word to the wise: do not smoke before going grocery shopping with only 12 bucks. So stressful.
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
I woke up with a piece of pizza duct taped too my hand and a paragraph written on my chest. Good night is say
Will do. If it all falls thru I'm just gonna set up a sprinkler in my back yard and run thru it while taking jello shots. Perfect alternative to my 29th bday.
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
also Jesus you really need to change your diet. I just washed your baby gravy out of my hair and it's so acidic my hair is damaged. You have killer sperm
They flooded the bathroom and their version of cleaning it up was to throw our couch cushions on it. That's when I decided to chug tequila and go drunk bowling. So hitting the kid with my ball is really their fault.
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
Randomize
