why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
Yeah man it sucked balls. People on the bus probably thought I was fucking crazy. I was fetal position, taking up two seats with no shame whilst simultaneously panting.
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
It's like your tits told gravity 'fuck you, I'm fine right here!'
A guy with a mustache poured a beer down your throat while you had a crippled boy named Sunshine riding your back
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
Do you want to talk about dinosaurs?
Worst case scenario- he paid me for sex with meatloaf. There are worse thing, right? I mean at least is was good meatloaf.
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
Hope you’re getting action boo.
Definitely no. I woke up next to a bag of McDonald's.
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
I just had a morning three-some with marijuana and a detachable shower-head
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