apparently i walked up to the counter, put $30 worth of snacks next to this girl, and went 'uhh i have no money'
So I just almost came on my own face I had to dodge it as it was flying by...that was a first
He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
When I woke up my bed had been moved to the middle of my living room, a hippie was spooning me on one side and a pile of cocaine on the other, did I go through a time warp or are we still in 2012?
You can't just walk around stealing hats from drunk boys and peeing in bathtubs. Turn down.
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
Randomize
