i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
i'm having a wet tshirt contest with myself and yet i'm still losing
I am literally too baked to press the call button. How am I supposed to bone him?
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
Dude just slipped a $20 into the jukebox at that restaurant we were escorted out of last Mardi GRAS. Hope they enjoy Justin Bieber's Baby cause they're gonna hear it 40 fucking times.
On the bright side his mom approves of me. Though it's apparently because she sleeps with married men and has a soft spot for "fellow homewreckers"
He's coming back with me for the week. It took me saying "I don't wanna drive myself home... I'm better as a passenger giving road head" for him to jump at it. Rack another one up for my magical openings.
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
Alright whatever you say... But in the future when you really wish you had a dildo don't come crying to me about it.
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
The other day, he sent me a snapchat of his dick in the forest. He captioned it "nature nudes."
PokemonGo as navigation to get some at 5:13 AM. Life choices, yo.
handcuff keys just fell out of my bra....wtf happened last night?
Lesson Learned: It's not a party until someone pisses their pants.
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