Nicole vs. Life
Turns out drinking large amounts of Gentleman Jack does NOT turn you into a Gentleman -- quite the opposite actually.
I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
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Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
Boob shaped ice luge is ordered for my bday. Boom
I can't even drink.
The liquor comes out the nipples. Out. The. Nipples.
He's like a father figure to me, except we have casual drunk sex every now and then
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It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
Shooting a bottle rocket from my penis was entirely justified. Twenty bucks is twenty buck no matter how you look at it
Please don't fuck the professor. We both know that won't end well.
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
5 seconds ago I had no idea that a fart could travel so fastly thru the tanning bed. I taste it in the back of my neck.
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
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