idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
My workout was carrying 2 cases home from the grocery. It's Bowl Week.
had a convo with my professor before class while peeing... new level of awkward or a breakthrough in our relationship? i feel like there is no longer a professional boundary.
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
Next time I say "Watch this" Get me the fuck out of the bar.
I put the extra pregnancy test in my sex toys box as a reminder that my actions have consequences.
I'm hiding out in the living room until he falls back asleep. If he catches a whiff of my tits, it's all over. I just need to play it cool. Babies can smell fear
We're not in high school anymore. I'm not going to pretend to be impressed as he butchers my favorite songs on his guitar. I just wanted to get laid.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
I've got the dick your vagina needs, but not the one it deserves right now.
She asked for references to decide whether she wanted to have sex with me. And she was serious.
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
"I'm 22, I could die in a piano bar." -a sentence i actually just said to my boss
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