Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
Everytime she tries to call me all I can think about is when she tripped walking down my steps during her walk of shame. Then I laugh until it goes to voicemail
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
Woke up on a mattress on a roof this morning with a pair of briefs next to me. Oh fleet week.
Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?
Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way
There's a picture of you on facebook laying in the street with 3 cops standing over you after you faceplanted off that guy's shoulders.
Is that what happened to my face?!
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
Randomize
