the not having weed thing wouldnt be nearly as tragic if it wasnt the one holiday where they launch bright flaming things into the air
It was like the Ritz Carlton of jails. I got introduced to our criminal system the right way.
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
He's fat, has man boobs, and is uncircumsized. I feel like I won the last woman on earth prize.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You're barking up the wrong lesbian.
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
He broke into my apartment to check his Facebook again, the beer is all gone, and there's a new high score on pac man.
I'm watching people hook up tonight who, when they wake up tomorrow, are going to wish they were blind.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If he tries to stick his thumb up my butt again im going to rip his dick off with my vagina
I told you those kegels would come in handy one day
I just sneezed weed. Kinda wanna try to smoke it.
Yeah, tell that to my thumb. Cause it was up my ass all night waiting for you.
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
UGH I HATE BEING THIS WAY IM GOING TO GO HUG THE CACTUS YOU GOT ME
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
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