24 hour fitness called offering me a free trial stating that you referred them to me. I told them you have been taking pics of naked guys in the locker room and selling them online.
That's not a bad idea, actually...
If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
Remember the time we were horrifically hung over, went to mcdonalds, an you merely felt the weight of the mcnuggets box and knew there was an extra?
like it was yesterday
It's just one of those days where I'm too horny to function, to be perfectly honest.
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
so I definitely just chased tequila shots with a biscuit covered in sausage gravy
Thats fucking manlier than riding a bear into battle
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
I love you so much and not just because your dick is perfect
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