K I think ***** turned off her phone. Guess I can't make her feel any more miserable tonight so I'm goin to sleep
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
Fuuuuck. Forgot it's October. FYI scarecrows are gonna fuck you up when you're driving high
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.
If I get laid, we are framing that mattress and hanging it on the wall as the place we both lost our virginities.
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
I only get hit on by people going through their midlife crisis. Yes, I did purposely write that gender neutral.
I never thought it would be so hard to find a power hour partner at 2 on a Wednesday
Thanks for DJing my sex last night. You were on point 💜
where are my pants?
in the oven.
Do you think telling guys I'm majoring in magic is a good pickup line?
Randomize
