It's more exciting when they aren't single....and even better when you have to pretend that you just slept with their roommate while trying to do the walk a shame as their girlfriend comes marching into the apt.
Im not the least bit jealous of the life you lead.
Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm using process of elimination to determine which of our neighbors i fucked last night.
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
They can be so fun, drunk bruises are like clues to the treasure of what actually happened last night. "why do I have a bruise on my belly button? oh right. i was trying to turn my stomach off so I would stop throwing up."
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He just took a bite of each taco bell burrito and hid them throughout my apartment. this was 2 weeks ago and have found 30 burritos so far
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
my last search of the night was "the physics of green eggs and ham" what the fuck
I almost rear ended this hot guy driving a Porsche Cayenne just so I could get his phone number
I have wine with a bendy straw bitches I can do fucking anything
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
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