Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
I ran into the bouncer who kicked me out of that beach bar a few months ago. I told him I'd only been thrown out of two other places since then. He was proud.
You were convinced you would hurt my car if you opened the door. Then you barfed in the pretzle bucket Peter gave you
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
I don't know what else to tell you.. just listen to some taylor swift and you'll know what to do in the morning
I asked him if we were exclusive and he followed up with, "If a tree falls in the woods and no ones around, does it still make a sound?" Wtf am I supposed to do with that?!
Randomize
