what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
Woke up to a denim duvet cover this morning... why r guys so tacky?
Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
my little brother just asked me why i have handcuffs. How do I tell him that his sister likes being taken advantage of in the bedroom?
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
Oh god he's like Julia Roberts in pretty woman... And I'm the one who's gotta make a lady out of him.
I now own a bag of cigarettes and have no purse, awesome
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
She shoved a hot dog in my pocket and started grinding on it.
Wait do we still get bagels if no one got laid
I know it doesn't seem right, but sometimes, bagels are just flat out called for.
i sent my dealer a picture of the money i would pay him. i also told him i would pay him in cheez-its if he would prefer that.
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
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