worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
And dont tell me its his job to cockblock me just because he's my boyfriend.
Ahhh sometimes you just need a thermos of whiskey in the library
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
I don't know whether to call the hospital or call the prison first.
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
You were discovered in a bush, smoking, and singing "in the jungle" to yourself. Which explains the scratches, but not the orange paint.
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
Juice tastes so weird without alcohol
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
Randomize
