There's nothing I can say to make me pepper spraying you any better
By the end of the cruise, there was literally nothing in our room he hadn't peed on.
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
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I think I died last night. I had 14 beers..well 13 1/2 if you count the one that got spilled on the baby in the elevator.
Just a heads up before you get home. Took the shelves out of the fridge so i could fit the beer ball and bucket of riot punch. Apparently i decided the stove was the best place to keep them. They got cooked when we pre heated to cook a bird we shot. This may be the final straw for our security deposit
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
Look, opening a Guinness with a steak knife and nearly cutting your finger off to make another carbomb is always a good idea.
Best case scenario: sex with hot bartender \nWorst case scenario: no sex and punched by tattooed guy that may or may not be said bartenders boyfriend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
I was jerking him off and in two seconds he went from "oh yeah that feels good" to "what day is Thanksgiving again?" and then back again. Like wtf.
Weird thing is that's not the first time I've been felt up by a Santa. Happens every year
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
Talking to a customer about getting high and staring at glow in the dark wheels while there is a cop in the store. Just another day in Tampa
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
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