Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
You just kept saying "they don't make cigarettes for squirrels. Yet."
I think there's a website warning girls about me based on the 4 who approached me separately tonight and called me evil. Fuckyoudave.com?
Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?
I love you. We're gonna celebrate your 21st by putting people in duct tape bikinis and pushing them down tequila slip and slides
I'm jealous that you can use my boobs as pillows & I can't.
I swear you won't find cereal in your washer machine again.
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
I found your missing hash cookies. Fuck you and I'm sorry but there are only 2 left. I already had the munchies.
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
If he knew how badly I want to blow him he’d stop talking about his wife
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