I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
dinner with the girl I motorboated last semester wasn't as awkward as I thought it would be
Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center.
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
Moral of the story: don't have drunken shower sex with the lights off...or you WILL break your foot. And the shower knobs.
i found out she really is a mensa member
so she was the smartest passed out on the floor hair encrusted in vomit girl at the party
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
I'm the only person who goes to break up a friends with benefits and comes out with a boyfriend
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
The guy like flippppped out and made me pay $15 for a car wash. I thought I was being extremely courteous by making sure to puke outside the window
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