Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
There's a woman here that looks like a cross between Michael Jackson and Flipper.
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
She told me to wait on the sofa while she freshened up. She's been in the bathroom for an hour. I have a bad feeling about this.
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
No one figured out why I brought along the vibrating massager.
My professor just gave us a margarita recipe.
Why?
Because, and I quote, he "wants to give us the tools to succeed in life."
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
I've been eating like all day, let me suffer my one 'Dear lord, I'm the size of a small whale. One that doesn't even need to find being killed by illegal whaling because I'm not even big enough to provide an decent blubber, but still big enough to be considered for a brief moment.' moment in peace.
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
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