So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
gotta love it when a reminder comes up on your phone and u think u forgot about a meeting or something then u read it and its only to remind me to go to the titty bar at 3
I understand Curling. That high.
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
Just puked up hair, tacos and vodka. Hello Memorial Day weekend.
You kept trying to throw the grocery cart off the balcony.
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
Is "I am going to murder you if you keep sending me requests that I cannot fulfill" unprofesh?
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
That was the first time i’ve been physically intimidated by a LinkedIn profile.
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