i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
to be honest..when i was little i used to think sharks can swim out of drains and eat people
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
He looked at me and said "Last call" before putting his penis away into his boxers
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
The woman at the bus stop told me i smell delicious and asked if i wear cotton then proceeded to tell me about her shellfish allergy
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
he's a firefighter. like being a firefighter screams MY DICK IS HUGE SO I'M NOT AFRAID TO DIE IN THIS FIRE.
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
So I'll bring my machete and we can smoke your shit.
Out of context, that is a hilariously scary message.
When did we go from stumbling drunk into an ER at 3am to dinner double dating?
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
I bought him flowers and fake vampire fangs, cuz there's really not a greeting card that says "Sorry I got wasted last night and started a very sloppy bloodletting ritual.".
Randomize
