Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(248): View more from Michigan

That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul

(313): View more from Michigan

Not half as good looking as paul

(248): View more from Michigan

I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge

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(402): View more from Nebraska

They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"

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(412): View more from Pennsylvania

Her facebook status said "just got a sign from god". I texted her and apparently she found a slice of pizza in the shower.

(1-412): View more from Pennsylvania

You almost married that.

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(904): View more from Florida

Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice

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(206): View more from Washington

You know you're getting old when you pick up hot sorority girls at the bar, and they write down their phone number, and under it 'we're great babysitters!'

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