whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
He looks like Jesus, if Jesus had let himself go.
Make note: the first date is too soon to make the "condoms are only for making balloon animals" joke.
he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
Whenever someone from high school gets pregnant or has a pregnancy scare my self esteem grows a good 5 points
Apparently I told the bartender to stop putting ice in my drink because it was taking up too much room
It was super embarrassing when I had to tell my brother, in front of my mother, that my wifi password was Drinkupbitches. Thanks for providing that lovely family moment.
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
Of course, it's a law of friendship. "Thy friend Shalt always hold hatred for thine friend's swinish ex"
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
When I found out he was circumcised I called his mother and thanked her
Randomize
